Let’s see how it’s going to go. First, Hillary, 70-something at her inauguration. Then Michelle. She’ll be a peach. Then Chelsea. (Face it. The Bushes are the Plantagenets in this story, and the Kennedys might as well be Aelfric the Obsolete. All those penises and things.) After Chelsea has finished turning the United States into the Politically Correct States of Ghana, Malia can become the new Madonna of Argentina. It’s going to be great.
After she marries Chris Brown and gets beaten to a pulp, the country will rally around her and she can sing…
It will probably replace the Star Splattered Banner at games of the national pastime, girls’ soccerbasket.
By then, thankfully, I’ll be dead as a fucking doornail. Can you make the same boast?