The Leftminster Dog Show

British Imperialism wins again.

British Imperialism wins again.

Somebody told me recently they don’t take the links at this site. Don’t do that this time. Actually, you shouldn’t ever do that. Links are a huge part of what I’ve always done. I wouldn’t point and say read the whole thing if I didn’t mean it. Part of the reason I’m sitting in a corner in the Pine Barrens. There are no shortcuts in thinking, no easy bottom lines, no chutes and ladders to the obvious right answers. If you don’t understand this, you don’t understand me.

I’m not going to tell you what these links are about. They just are:

Link One.

Link Two.

Where were we? Oh. Something lighter. America’s premier dog show, which concluded last night. I’m sure a lot of you missed it, what with all the excitement about the resuscitation of the Stalinist era in Russia being celebrated by NBC on one-and-a-half or two channels of Comcast’s new show dog news network for the 99 percent, including MSNBC. So I took the liberty of acquiring some erudite quotes about the event, which are always much much better than encountering the event itself. No links, though. Who needs them? The words are all you need if you’ve got your mind right.

“Anybody else catch that dog action in one-percent land last night? Seven dogs competing for Best in Show. Not one whose origins aren’t associated with white, imperialist, racist, homophobic powers. Germany, France, Portugal, Ireland, Wales, and, of course, England. How dead white European male can you get?”

“Where was the dingo? The African Wild Dog? The scarred up Urban Pit Bull? Why do they all have to be so Upper East Side. Speaking for myself, I’m disgusted.”

“I didn’t feel any suspense about the outcome. Five of the seven finalists were brown or mostly so: the bloodhound, corgi, Irish water spaniel, Portuguese Water Dog, and Miniature Pinscher. Then there was the French poodle, obviously gay as can be and an obvious loser in this context. The inevitable winner? The vicious, racist little prick of an English breed that has already won more than any other: the Wire Haired Fox Terrier. Mostly white but always pure killer.”

“Is it just me or is there some kind of horrifying irony about yet another win by a breed whose whole purpose in life was to support the Brits’ mindlessly cruel genocide of foxes? What victim has ever been pursued by more outlandishly overmatched forces? Dozens of uniformed men and women mounted on 1200 pound horses, accompanied by packs of their specially bred dogs, to run to ground one brown colored fugitive? Oh. Now I remember. The pursuit of runaway slaves. And we are still elevating this shameful past and bestowing laurels upon it? When will we come to our senses?”

“Did you see the “champion” standing there in his shrunken but puffed up pomposity? He is carrying the DNA of the criminal imperialist past in his every pore. I shouldn’t say this, I suppose, but I yearned for some PETA activist to run into the arena and put him down on the spot. How surprised and shocked the little bitch would have been. He might have had a last moment of recognition of the foul legacy of his founding. I’m reminded of the old saying, “Every dog has his day.” I haven’t had mine yet, but neither have the foxes. We’re both waiting.”

That’s enough for now. For the sake of the squeamish, I’ve left out all the hundreds of quotes and tweets that used the words f**k, m*****f****r, c**t, a**hole, d*****bag, etc. I’m sure you know how they go. The way the enlightened, tolerant members of our most gifted elites refer to the rest of us mongrel scum.

10 thoughts on “The Leftminster Dog Show

  1. An awful lot of guilt for such a small dog. On the other hand, who created that stupid cut?

    And people are just pathetic ranting about Shirley Temple’s being a Republican. Twitter should be banned. Just saying.

    • I dunno, Alfa. More an impossible cut than a stupid one. It accentuates who they are. Not nearly as silly as flowing cocker feathers, silken Scottie underhangs and the bleached eyes of the Bichon Frise. Not to mention all the poodle nonsense. In comparison to these, the wire haired cut is clean and elegant. Even if they never look like that in real life.

      If you’d taken Link 2, you’d see that it’s not just a twitter problem. It’s a lefty problem.

  2. Where the holy hell do you find… oh, never mind. I’m actually grateful for lack of links in the latter part of the article. Good lord. The gormless git that thinks genocide can be waged on a different species should get a dictionary. And a grip. Just not, you know, a pistol grip, because that makes it an assault perspective.

    It’s a bunch of dogs. Carefully trained, lovingly raised, lavished with more attention than most creatures will ever experience in far longer lifetimes. Just dogs, with nary a thought in their fuzzy heads for the idiocy people project onto them about long-gone history. The more I know about dogs, and the more I see of people, the more I think I might end up with a small pack and a hermit-like existence.

  3. I don’t know, Peregrine John. I’m thinking we’ve been had. Somebody who’s really mad at the treatment of an innocent Shirley Temple might have reverted to the satirical full cry of Instapunk.

    In a word, I’m skeptical. Did you know rfl has had two wire haired fox terriers? I think he posted pictures at Instapunk . Anybody else remember?

    Maybe I got it wrong .

  4. I’m stuck on the links. The ravings of a lunatic drowning in his lefty perspective on the dog show is ridiculous, but those links revealed the infected underbelly with chilling clarity. The second link especially shows the mindset behind the curtain, a completely accidental reveal of a hideous hatred. This is what the news media is thinking ALL the time, we just almost never get to see through the tiny cracks in the wall. The gradual abuse of language to just slowly and subtly tweak the minds of news readers to the left. Apply for 40 years and you’ve turned a generation.

  5. Why can’t anybody give some love to the terrier? Next to Raebert, wire-haired Tess was the smartest dog I ever had. Problem solving? Systematic, intelligent, thorough, and successful. In contrast, Raebert shows less activity, but he just knows. A lot scarier — even if it doesn’t lessen the Sherlock Holmes acuity of a fox terrier.

    People hate the English that much?

    • I left for the links but came back for the terrier. While I can’t get behind the finery of perfect trims for dog show dogs, I fully endorse the brilliance of some of the small breeds. I’ve enjoyed spending lots of time with some smarter large breeds, but I have mainly known the not-so-bright but full of love big guys. But our experience with ingenious and thoughtful small dogs brings me back, and when our boys are ready to share the house with dogs, I think we’ll go that direction.

      The Holmes reference is the second I’ve heard from you recently — have you been watching the new BBC version or that American version?

  6. When did our people abandon thought?

    Usually being able to write was a precursor to being able to think. Now writing is shrieking hatred. Have such people always existed but been culturally mute without blogs and twitter?

    • I think that’s it — these non-thoughts always existed in their heads and were maybe spoken to their families and coworkers, but the idiot chain stopped there at the first link. Now it is instantly public, searchable, hyperlinked, archived, permanent, and encouraged into a tidal wave. Technology hasn’t made them stupid, but it has amplified their stupidity to a worldwide stage.

      I, for one, am for it. While it’s sad to see the civilization die, at least its dying transparently, without a rotting from the inside with a thin facade of manners, politeness, and actual thoughts. It certainly makes it easier to tell who is who.

      • Being able to tell who’s who is small consolation before the spectacle of a once-fine people voting to abolish themselves. Why must they drag me down with them?

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