Franklin Roosevelt
from The Boomer Bible,
Book of Yanks

Chapter 116 (starting at the 2nd verse) It was... starting to become obvious that the Allies were going to win the war eventually, 3  And so the Allies all got together at Yalta to decide how Europe would be divided up after the war, 4  Which is to say the countries conquered by the Brits and Yanks would be free, 5  And the countries conquered by the Russkies would be enslaved in a vast totalitarian state, 6  Which all seemed very fair to those in attendance, 7  Since nobody had invited any Czechs or Poles or Albanians or Romanians to the meeting, 8  And since Roosevelt had just been elected to his fourth term as president of the Yanks, 9  Which was a record, 10  And who cares about a bunch of Poles and Czechs when you've got a record like that, 11  Because there aren't too many presidents who are so honest and great that they can be reelected even though they're almost dead in a wheelchair, 12  And practically senile to boot, 13  Or why would he ever have agreed to give half the world to a murderous tyrant like Stalin, 14  And then died almost immediately, 15  Without telling his vice president anything about what to do next, 16  Unless that's not really how it was at all, 17  Which it couldn't be, 18  Because Roosevelt was far too honest and great to do anything wrong, 19  As every Yank knows, 20  Somehow.